I used to be solely a dog owner back in the day. I love dogs! They really are man’s best friend! They’re super friendly, hyper, loving, and deeply loyal. But sometimes… it’s just a little too much! Emphasis on the hyper part!
Dogs could be all up in your face, licking you and barking out of sheer elation. Maybe they’ll run around in circles! And the little thing where dogs bow and lower the front part of their body, waiting for you to throw that toy… It’s so fudging adorable! I just want to smush their faces in sometimes!
But its… its just too much sometimes! Dogs bark and they bark loud. Even the tiniest of dogs have a booming voice! It always seems as if the thought “stranger danger” is always on their mind! I know it’s to protect their pack and to show their undying devotion and love, but it does get bothersome at times…
During my journey in life, I ended up adopting my very own feral cat, to which I lovingly named Diba. I love this cat! I pretty much kidnapped her from the wild and kept feeding her until she came down with Stockholm syndrome. Now she absolutely loves me! Muahaha!
After adopting my little Diba, I found that cats express their emotions in very different ways. It’s very subtle… almost graceful in a sense. Cats really do speak another language than dogs. Sometimes, it could be a little confusing to know if your cat really cares. But if you observe closely, you will find that your cat is always sending you some loving vibes!
I personally have three cats. What’s so interesting is that they all have different ways of saying “I love you” and with showing affection! Here are some of the things that I have noticed in my own cats which may help you communicate more effectively with your own feline companion.
Cats Want Your Attention
Cats are pretty independent creatures. Cats can pretty much do just fine without you, but they still kind of need you to feed them and change their litter. But they don’t need you.
That’s why when your cat comes strolling by and demands you to give her attention, it really is a special encounter! They could’ve spent their precious time grooming themselves, chasing their tail, looking out the window, or snoozing away. But no… they chose to spend those precious seconds with you!
You probably heard the stories of how cats always sit on top of their human’s computer keyboard. Or maybe they move in between you and your book while you were having an afternoon reading session. Or maybe they just keep meowing at you. Whatever they are doing, they do it for your attention! They need you for something! Huzzah! Please, my cat overlord, what is it that you desire?
Scarcity creates value, and our cats are truly the masters of this. They give us just the right amount of love and attention that we always crave for more. But right when we’re about to get our fill, they off and leave! Such a tease!
My little feral, Diba, likes to come up to my laptop and just sit on the keyboard. She just looks up at me with these big eyes as if she is saying “excuse me, you may pet me now.” And that’s exactly what she wants! She just wants a little head rubbing and maybe a word of affection or two. Then she’ll resume to lay down near me and purr herself to sleep. It really does melt my heart.
The Slow Blink
You busily type away at your computer, getting your work done and being a good human. You decide to take a break and stretch a little. You look up to see your cat lying down lazily in a chair in front of you. Your eyes meet those of your cat. And slowly, but surely, your cat proceeds to blink with deliberate intent. This, my fellow cat owners… is the cat kiss.
In the wild, cats are excellent hunters, yet they are also prey to many other bigger animals. Cats always have a constant awareness of their surroundings. To break eye contact with you, to look away, to blink, or anything else signifies trust. Your cat trusts you so she feels comfortable with blinking in front of you. It’s a very normal behavior to humans, but to cats, it is their way of showing you their love.
My youngest cat, Baby or Gami (her name changes depending on my mood), does not like cuddles and she does not like to be petted. It’s really weird! She’s got a lot of boundaries. But she always does this slow blink at me whenever we make eye contact. It’s always this slow and very affectionate blink that tells me that she is feeling comfortable and loved.
Their Tail Tells All
Cats use body language to communicate their thoughts and emotions. One way they express how they feel is through the use of their tails. Depending on the cat’s posture and tail position, you can tell a lot about what feelings a cat is currently experiencing.
When your cat has a puffed up tail and arches her back, this signifies that your cat feels threatened or frightened. This usually means that your cat is in flight or fight mode, and is looking or a fight!
However, when your cat’s tail is in an upward position or there is a little curve to the tip, this usually means that your cat is happy and glad to see you! Maybe even a bit curious to know where you’ve been! When you see your cat’s tail in this position, you will most likely see your cat lovingly paying attention to you. She may want head rubs or a treat, but she is glad to be in your presence and she is feeling good!
Kneading Some Bread
Cats are masterful bakers. Their kneading skills are world class!
You may find that when you’re relaxing and reading a book, or maybe you’re on youtube watching some cat videos because you just can’t get enough… your cat may come strolling over to rest right next to you or on your lap. Then it begins. The kneading.
It’s rather adorable! But if you don’t regularly trim your cat’s claws, you will soon find out that kneading is probably one of the most painful experiences as a cat owner. All of a sudden, your cat just starts digging her claws into you. Like what is this? Why!
The entire reasons are unclear, but many researchers believe that the cat’s kneading behavior stems from kittenhood. Kittens will usually knead their mother when nursing in order to promote the milk flow. Many people believe that cats do this in adulthood whenever they are feeling comfortable and happy as it is reminiscent of this beautiful bonding moment when they were kittens. Cats also knead their sleeping areas more it more comfortable.
Love Nibbles
There might be some occasions when you’re petting your cat, where your cat tries to nibble on you a little. This is affectionate nibbling and it is a sign of love and adoration. Sometimes, when my cat Diba tries to wake me up in the morning, she will start to lick my eyelids and chin. She may even start nibbling on my chin a little bit to get my attention! Just know that your cat isn’t trying to attack you, but rather show you love in their own special way.
This is why it is so important for you to never play with your cat with your hands and fingers. When their kittens, they could be so cute and their little claws and teeth really can’t do any damage. Yet as they grow older, these cats get trained to believe that playing with human hands and biting hard is an acceptable behavior. If you don’t heed this warning, you may find these love nibbles to become love bites! Love nibbles are good! Love bites are bad!
Cats will nibble on you to show you love as well. They will ever so gingerly use their teeth to snip at you a little bit then give you a little lick. This is really special. This does not happen very often. But when it does… it makes me feel so privileged!
Final Thoughts
There are many ways your cat expresses her love for you! You may even find that each and every cat has her own way of showing affection. Some may want your attention and even do drastic things to get it. Others may simply enjoy curling down next to you in quiet serenity. Just take some time to observe your cat and you will see exactly how much you mean to her. YOur bond can only grow stronger over time and with effective communication.
One of my cat, Cornelius, always needs to come up on my lap each and every night. It’s a little tradition of ours where he doesn’t give a sugar honey iced tea about anything! Just plop on my lap and he’ll start kneading! Love hurts. But it’s the good kind of hurt!
Sincerely,
James Kim
